We always promote sharing to our children. "Let you brother play with that car", "Give your sister a bite of your ice cream". As adults though, we often do not follow that advice. I know I do not. I am willing to share almost anything, but there are some things that are MINE! I would never let anyone wear my Hamilton watch that my beautiful wife gave me for our third anniversary. I would never let anyone carry my Springfield Armory 1911 Pistol. Most importantly though, I would never let anyone covet my wife. If we are not willing to share EVERYTHING, how can we expect the same from our kids?
My oldest son has a collection of cars that are his pride and joy. He is very careful with them and does not like anybody to disturb them. His little brother always wants to play with, but he treats them like a rental car. He gets them muddy, throws them on the concrete and shows them no respect. Number 1 son refuses to let Dos play with them. I used to make them share, but not anymore. I have realized that those cars are my sons most prized possessions and I will not make him put them at risk.
I am not saying that they do not have to share, but do they have to share everything? Some things are special. Some things have sentiment to them and you want to take care of it. I enjoy seeing that my son has something that he cares about and wishes to preserve. It is an indication that someday he will appreciate what he has. Maybe he will take care of his first car when he turns 16. Maybe he will take care of his house when he buys one. It forms an understanding that you take care of your stuff. It reminds me of the old cavalry saying, "take care of your horse and your horse will take care of you".
The next time your kids are fighting over toys, do not just start yelling for them to share, take into consideration what they are fighting over. It may seem like nothing to you, but it could be that one item that your child truly cherishes.
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